IC INBOX: PRISMATICA

[inheritedpain]

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Jin Ling ⬤ The Untamed
residential district ⬤ couch surfing hobo
moonblessing ⬤ iris

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[inheritedpain]

[ He lets himself be drawn in, his worry making his brow crease sharply, his face pressing into his Uncle's shoulder. ]

Don't be stupid! [ He grumbled lowly. ] You rebuilt Lotus Pier, you reformed an entire sect! You're stronger than anyone, this is the stupidest thing I've ever heard!!

[ He presses his face harder into Jiang Cheng's shoulder, the sound muffled but his voice too loud to really block out. ]

You're so stupid, I'm not going to leave you! You're the-- [ He choked a little. ] You're the closest thing I ever had to a father, why would I ever leave you?

[consignation]

[ Jiang Cheng's head jerks up at those last words, ready to dismiss all of the boy's defense of him until those last words. He's said it before, but it's always felt in the context of someone else, another life Jiang Cheng had no way of connecting with, of breaking through to. Just a part of Jin Ling's life related to him only by association.

But this time, it follows Jin Ling telling Jiang Cheng he's not leaving, and that fact seizes him by the throat.

Letting out a sharp, pained breath, he holds Jin Ling tighter. He shouldn't commit Jin Ling to this. His nephew isn't much younger than him, but young enough to be at the height of his teenage recklessness, barreling into things headfirst with no grasp, no consideration for how much it will hurt.

But he wants it too badly. Like with Jin Zixuan, he knows better and still cannot help himself at all, his worst weaknesses all lying in the gaps of love that life tears from his hands again and again, offering him but a single maddening taste before leaving him behind. ]

...don't say you'll stay if you don't mean it. [ Jiang Cheng's voice is tight, strained, on the verge of cracking. ] It will be the end of me, A-Ling. Children grow up, they⁠—⁠ They make their own lives. If you tell me you stay and leave me all the same⁠—

...you're all I have. You're all the family I have.

[inheritedpain]

Why would I say it if I didn't mean it? [ He bit back, annoyed, but he didn't pull away. ]

I can't - I can't promise that I'll be here forever, because I could disappear just like - just like others have, against my will. But I'm never going to leave you willingly. Even if I - Even if you marry me off, if you don't want me to leave, then that's fine. She can come and live with us!

People leaving isn't the same thing as being gone. I'll drag Wei Wuxian back here for you, if I have to. But why would I want to go anywhere?

[ He slumped a little, some of the fire draining from him and leaving him tired. ]

Do you think I have zero filial piety, or something? I swear...

[consignation]

It doesn't matter what I think. I thought Wei Wuxian, too⁠—

[ There was a time Jiang Cheng believed every word Wei Wuxian said to him. What reason did he have to doubt? They'd been together for everything, since Wei Wuxian came to Lotus Pier. ]

...I thought a lot of things.

[ That his parents would live to old age. That they had so much time together still, to sort out their differences, to love each other, to overcome all the world had to throw at them together.

That they three siblings would be there for each other forever.

Now he's here, with his sister's child, with nothing on his mind but loss and uncertainty. He lets out his breath, tight and pained, and holds Jin Ling that much closer. ]

...you're a good boy, A-Ling. And it wouldn't... be wrong of you, to leave. I just⁠—

[ Jiang Cheng sucks in a breath, squeezing his eyes shut. ]

I'm just tired of always being the one left behind.

[inheritedpain]

Well I’m not leaving you behind!

[ He muttered, tired and frustrated and... well, worried. He’d never really seen his uncle like this before. He’d always seemed so hard and stoic...

He swallowed thickly. Had this all changed him that much? ]

I’m not going anywhere. I’ll always be your nephew.